Monday, October 24, 2011

It's A Birthmark

"This is going to grow, " the pediatrician told me back in 2002, when she noticed a tiny birthmark on Julia's two-week old arm.  "It's called a hemangioma.  We won't need to do anything about it," she said.  "It will eventually go away."

By age six months, the hemangioma was bigger than my baby's arm. 

Because of the birthmark, I dressed Julia in long sleeves for most of her baby pictures.  Even though it was part of her, I was afraid if the birthmark showed in a photo, it would be all anyone would notice.  On just one occasion, I had her photographed with her birthmark in plain view.  As she grew older, I wanted to remember everything about her baby years - including her birthmark.  I wanted her to know that I wasn't ashamed of how God made her.

Everywhere we went, people stared.  Some asked questions.  Occasionally kids were mean, but most of the time they were just embarrassingly honest.  My standard line was, "It doesn't hurt.  It's a birthmark and it will go away on its own when she's older."  My matter of fact response was mainly meant for Julia's ears.

Nine years later, Julia's birthmark is almost gone.  The doctor was right.  The huge mass has mostly vanished and it's no longer bright red.  What's left is mostly stretched-out, loose skin on her right arm.

Today I asked her if she'd like to have the loose skin on her arm removed by a surgeon.  Her response was priceless.

"Why?" she gasped.  "This is how God made me."  She seemed appalled that I'd even suggest such a thing. 

"This birthmark is something special that God gave me.  When God looks at all the people in the world, this birthmark is part of what makes me, me. . ."  She stumbled for the right words.  "Why would we want to remove a part of me that God made?"

"Do people ask you about it?"

"All the time."

"What do you say?"

"I say, 'It's a birthmark."

Well, there you go.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Sometimes the Pictures Say it All

I'm finishing up Wenxin's 12 month post placement report.  For Wenxin's adoption, China requires updates at 6 months and 12 months.  These updates involve having a social worker visit us in our home and write a report on how we are all adjusting.  We also have to include photos. Tomorrow, we are mailing our last report!

On this momentous occasion, I feel I should write a deep insightful post about our first year together.  And I'm officially stumped.  How do you put it all into words? 

Our family's journey has best been told in stories from our day to day life.  I've tried to tell them honestly.  I've tried to paint a picture of what an older child adoption looks like in real life. 

So for today, let's just let the photos do the talking.

That was then. . .

And this is now. . .

Sunday, October 9, 2011


Fall.  Four home schooled kids.  Three soccer teams.  One Boy Scout troop.  A husband who travels.  And a mom with a broken foot.

It doesn't leave much time to blog.

But some things are too encouraging to leave unrecorded.

Last night, Wenxin and I were lying on my bed just having some talk and snuggle time before bed when he looked up at me and asked, "Do you think if another mom had adopted me, I would love her as much as I love you?"

It was a great opportunity to talk about how God works in our lives.  God knew what kind of Mom Wenxin needed.  And he knew what kind of son I needed.  God led us together and we are perfect for each other.